Jesse's should have been First Birthday...

We should have a sweet 1 year old Jesse in our arms today and celebrating his first birthday. Today is his should have been first birthday, if he was born on his due date last November 6th. We don't know if he would have been born on that date last year, but wish things would have turned out as we hoped. We celebrated his Angelversary/Birthday on June 23rd with road trips and camping trips to the mountains and ocean and that felt like a celebration of his life. We will always do that every year for him, on the anniversary when he was born still. Today feels harder and his absence is stronger as we think of what should have been today and always for our family of four. I wish my arms were full with a chubby one year old being sang happy birthday. The 23rd and 6th will always be meaningful days for our little j.They are the only dates that will truly belong to my second son, My sweet baby, we miss you so much.